I…hmm.
It should be noted that I am damn proud of who I am. I have zero problem speaking my mind. I have zero issues stating my beliefs, as well as zero issues with standing up for said beliefs. I WILL argue my point. I WILL put you in your place if you are being offensive or stepping out of line, and I WILL call you on your bullshit.
The thing about the way life works…is that one of the BEST ways to improve your life is by surrounding yourself by good people, and avoiding the shady people. It’s simple, but many people don’t think about it. If there are people in your life who always bring you down, who guilt trip you, who want everyone to feel sorry for them, who expect the world to revolve around them:
Stop hanging out with them. Stop conversing with them. The fact that they exist does NOT mean they have to be a part of your life. No one has any right to be a part of your life, they’re there because YOU allow them to be. So kick those shitheads to the curb an surround yourself with the good kind of people; the kind who will love and support you and be there for you, no questions asked.
That’s the secret to happiness. Everyone else just isn’t worth your fucking time.
~D
I feel like society is moving backwards. Women get “equal” rights and then a few decades go by & people try to take that shit away.
I better get a hysterectomy soon, before THAT becomes illegal too. *eyeroll*
Go Go Gadget Eating Disorders
Okay, I know some time ago I promised you all a rant on this whole pro-Ana bullshit, and it took til now to get around to it. You’ll have to understand, I am quite the procrastinator.
In any case, as you may or may not know, there is this new “movement” going around called pro-Ana. This movement is pro-anorexia. It is fueled by the idea that bone thin, sick, weak girls are beautiful.
This fucking disgusts me.
Yes, every girl (and boy) has the right to be beautiful. Yes, you should show support to people who are going through destructive cycles (cutting, not eating, etc) but supporting their decision to harm, and in some cases KILL themselves, is not the way to fucking do it.
You are telling these people that their insecurities are good. In fact, you are FUELING them. YOUR pro-Ana support is causing these people to get sick.
I know. I had exercise anorexia for YEARS. I ate nothing but romaine lettuce and the occasional almond. No salad dressing. No cheese. If there was no romaine lettuce, I wouldn’t eat. I drank nothing but water and once in a while I would allow myself gatorade. I went to the gym for HOURS every day, exercising until I thought I may pass out, sitting down to chug a bottle of water, and going right back at it. I wasn’t doing drugs, I wasn’t smoking cigarettes, I wasn’t drinking, and I wasn’t partying. I was eating clean protein [the almond] and was vegan [the romaine lettuce] and was exercising regularly. That made it healthy, right?
It wasn’t until someone in my speech class in college got up and spoke about her battle with exercise anorexia did I think I may even have a problem. It took over two years after that to eat everything I put on my plate. I have so many problems with my digestive system now that I get intense pains after eating anything with preservatives; my body no longer knows how to process it. I am sick with some sort of flu more often than not.
But I am healthier. I am not allowed to own a gym membership. I don’t own a scale. I have no fucking clue how much I weigh or how many calories I eat. I eat healthy these days, but the key factor is that I EAT.
If I hadn’t stopped myself, I am damn sure I wouldn’t be alive right now. Don’t fucking tell someone who is anorexic that they are doing the right thing. What they need is help and love, not someone supporting their decision to harm themselves.
Misfired neurons.
Supposedly some epileptics get an “aura” before a seizure. A bit of foreshadowing I suppose. An odd smell. A pit in your stomach. An odd taste. I can’t tell if that is what’s happening right now. I really don’t feel right, and it’s a much different sensation than anything I can pick from memory.
Well. Maybe. I feel as though I’ve been dosed with something almost. I’m almost scared to fall asleep because of it. But I’m exhausted.
Maybe that’s what it is. I’ve been up since 6 am. Maybe I just need sleep.
Ugh.
Tomorrow I am scheduling an appointment to get my brain checked. EEG. Amongst all the other things I need to do.
Side note: I hate that losing my job has made me such a recluse. I really don’t know how to deal with rejection.
